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Tuesday, September 11, 2012

Fiery Darts

(side note: I find it odd that when I really don't have time to blog, I blog, but when I do have time, I don't want to. oh well)

I just got to work literally four minutes ago. I unlocked the door to my 'bedroom' and put my stuff down. Then for some reason I went over and stood in front of one of the many book shelves (my 'bedroom' at work is a big room that connects the GH to a private residence home of the couple that used to run the GH --if that makes sense--and the couple has lots of church books stored in here). (here's a picture for reference)
there are even more books around the corner.
The shelves on the wall were where I was looking for some reason. There was a little book wedged in between several larger books. The spine said, "Whom the Lord Loveth. The Journey of Discipleship" (By Neal A. Maxwell). Well today I was coming up with topics for my church topic journal and I had just added Discipleship. I grabbed it from the shelf and opened to a random page. The title was, Fiery Darts. Ok.....this is very 'coincidental'. I sat down and read the page. It was only a couple small paragraphs but it was something that I was meant to read. This is what it said:

"The scriptures warn of incoming "fiery darts'; unless deflected or estinguished by the "shield of faith" (D&C 27:17), some get through to sting and burn. Included are intellectual barbs dipped in doubt and deliberately designed to get under the skin.
Fiery darts may not disable, but they certainly can discourage and distract. Very individualized, these fiery darts can be like "time-on-target: artillery, thereby achieving maxium effect.
Yet we have the promise that 'God would have extended his arm and supported you against all the fiery darts of the adversary; and he would have been with you in every time of trouble." (D&C 3:8)
No wonder the shield of faith serves us so well. But it had better be sturdy and in place!!"

This is what I needed to hear this week. I was given a blessing when I was 15 or 16 and included in that blessing was the phrase, "you will be able to avoid the fiery darts of the adversary".

So that is pretty coincidental, but this Friday I will be going to the temple for my very first time (as an adult). Last Friday I was up at the temple to get a few things and the lady helping me told me that it would be the most important thing I would do in my life (going to the temple). That the adversary will work very hard on me this week because he does not want me to go to the temple. I told her that I wouldn't let him effect me, that I have always been able to ignore temptation (smoking, drinking, partying, etc....). What I didn't realize was that there are other types of fiery darts. It makes sense and I just though 'duh!!' to myself.

The last several days I have been on edge for some reason. I'm not breathing all the way and feeling really overwhelmed with all the stuff I have to do. The school program that I signed up for started this week (when I was told it would start on the 17th). I hadn't paid for it, I hadn't even looked at emails to see what I was supposed to be doing, I had to plan and book flights to Provo next week and was having all sorts of issues with the reservations. I had four photo sessions to finish on the computer, plus 4 more to schedule, projects for the YW, I didn't get to sleep before 3:30am almost every night last week and I was exhausted and dehydrated. Blah blah, I could go on. You get the point. It was all very overwhelming and I just haven't been feeling like a good or productive person.

Then today coming to work and reading that short page in a 'randomly' selected book off a shelf next to hundreds of other books, I recognized what I have been feeling and where all those feelings and stress was coming from.

I was able to completely catch up on my photo sessions yesterday and today, complete all of my assignments for this week except for one I have to do on Thursday, got confirmation emails for my flights, and got started on next week's homework assignments (since I'll be gone). Today was good. I might have stayed in yoga pants until noon but I got what I needed to done. I feel 'lighter' and more able to focus on what needs to be done and what can wait.

My thoughts are more organized and I don't feel so overwhelmed. That is good. This week is good, despite it's horrible start.

I like this little book and I might ask to borrow it for a day or two.



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