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Thursday, December 30, 2010

Things I don't believe in


For Christmas I got a book, one that I've wanted for awhile. Go here to see more info. and read about "Gravy Days". I happen to have known the author for a very long time and am inspired by her talent and wit. One of the essays in her book was titled Things I don't Believe In. So far it is my favorite and it inspired me to write my own list. Here are some things I just don't believe in:

I don’t believe in getting out of bed before 8:30am
I don’t believe in letting the gas tank get below half full
I don’t believe in I before E except after C
I don’t believe blondes have more fun
I don’t believe you know the way to San Jose
I don’t believe raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens are my favorite things
I don’t believe socks should be worn with sandals
I don’t believe popped collars are ever necessary
I don’t believe in posting 15 news photos of yourself on Facebook everyday
I don’t believe in changing your last name on Facebook to match your celebrity crush
I don’t believe in judging a book by its cover
I don’t believe money is the key to happiness but it can’t hurt
I don’t believe in popcorn without butter
I don’t believe in public displays of affection
I don’t believe in clothing labels
I don’t believe those really are America’s funniest home videos- we can do better
I don’t believe 3-D is our future
I don’t believe Lady Gaga hails from planet Earth
I don’t believe in black licorice
I don’t believe in hand shaking
I don’t believe in fad diets
I don’t believe in ceiling popcorn
I don’t believe in colored dress shirts with white collars
I don’t believe in self-tanning lotion
I don’t believe in man-liner
I don’t believe in random airport pat downs
I don’t believe in posting 15 news photos of yourself on Facebook everyday  
I don’t believe in portion control
I don’t believe in white walls
I don’t believe in public restrooms
I don’t believe in any search engines except Google
I don’t believe anyone can get cell service in Wal-Mart
I don’t believe in mullets outside of 1984
I don’t believe in sleeping without socks on
I don’t believe in using windshield wipers unless absolutely necessary
I don’t believe in mini fridges
I don’t believe in skull candy headphones
I don’t believe in spelling the word, ‘resturant’ right
I don’t believe in white washed jeans
I don’t believe in wearing leggings as pants
I don’t believe in the word, ‘sista’
I don’t believe televised sports need sound
I don’t believe snuggies are uncool
I don’t believe in wrinkle cream
I don’t believe in bathroom self-portraits
I don’t believe in spanking
I don’t believe in chewing on the end of a borrowed pen
I don’t believe in talking about Lost on a turbulent airplane
I don’t believe in high heels
I don’t believe in wearing shoes in the summer or in the house
I don’t believe in oil filled bath beads
I don’t believe in off brand electronics
I don’t believe in paying full price
I don’t believe in As-Seen-on-Tv pitchmen
I don’t believe in paying $3 a gallon for gas
I don’t believe in jaywalking
I don’t believe in jumping in elevators
I don’t believe in Roseart crayons
I don’t believe in cheap shampoo


 I'm sure there will be more where that came from. I've had the phrase, I don't believe in....(fill in the blank) for the last 2 days. What is something you don't believe in?

You can buy the book HERE!
this ain't no paid advertisement I just think you should buy this book =)

2 comments:

amber malmberg said...

Hey Amanda. It was nice running into you at the bookstore the other day! I'm glad you were able to meet Royce! Well, I scrolled down your blog and read your post about your AWESOME picture from childhood. And I LOVE IT!!!!!!!
Seriously, you crack me up. The stick-on earings, poofy floral dress, and brightly colored watch that you can't even read time with sounds a lot like me too! Everything about that picture captures a girls childhood PERFECTLY!

The Black's said...

okay i so believe in everything you said! you crack me up...jake always makes fun of me for wearing socks to bed!

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